Writing My Autobiography

For the past 7-8 months I have been studying with Mary Browne, owner of Universal Pathways and a priestess in the Fellowship of Isis. It is a small class (one other person) and we meet once a month at Mary's lovely creation. I will be honest; I was not entirely sure what to expect when I signed up. All I knew was that I wanted to work with Mary. I had become familiar with her and Universal Pathways through HVPN. They sponsored day-long retreats at the center (which has several hundred acres and a house with a to-die-for library, beautiful temple area and plenty of comfortable places to meditate and just be) that were unbelievable. It was not the activities that made it a great experience; it was the lack of activities that allowed participants to revel in the center’s beauty and peace. But without Mary, it would not be the same.

When I first met Mary, I instantly felt good. At peace with myself. In the presence of a person who without hesitation would give you a nice warm hug and tell you that it was going to be okay. She has an air of quiet knowledge and power about her; it isn’t flashy or cast about to impress people. She just is. When I heard that she taught a Mystery School (or Goddess class, as it is casually called) I jumped at the chance to work with her.

The focus of the class is to awaken our sense of our own power and to seek assistance and inspiration from the Goddess. Mary likens the class to a pregnancy. It is 9 months long and with each trimester the experience gets more intense. At the first class she assigned a project that was due on the second to last class – our Autobiography. We are to read it to everyone in the class, without interruption. In the past some have lasted less than an hour, some have lasted 2 days. It is our opportunity to speak our truth, without criticism or fear.

Well, I didn’t work on mine that much, at first. I moved in June and the packing and sorting process took much of my attention. I finally settled down to write. The writing, as it has turned out, has been serving as a vehicle for healing, enlightenment and joy. As my story goes along (I am telling it as chronologically as I can) interesting things have been occurring. I wrote about my high school experience, which I relayed as a time of isolation and depression. Within a week I heard from a former high school classmate who mentioned how funny, child-like and interesting I was; in fact he said “I was before my time”. I was? I had no idea. As I unravel my memory, I am reliving experiences that have long been locked away and I am thinking about people who have been out of my life of a long time. I have begun to feel a sense of gratitude to people from my past, feeling blessed for all they gave me.

Taking a second look at what I had been writing, I realized that much of my initial story was written in a negative view point. It was rather dreary reading. I have started to go through it again, with a more compassionate eye. I don’t intend to remove things that were sad or tragic, but by stepping back I am find good memories and stories too. I have begun to realize it was not all gloom and doom. Even events that were not all that great are getting a fresh perspective.

I am not done writing it. I am in various stages of re-envisioning, editing and writing. It is due this Sunday (August 19th)! Time flies, doesn’t it? While I intend to have it completed by then I hope to move forward with care so that the end product isn’t rushed and incomplete.

Wait! Why am I still writing this post?? I have work to do! I’ll post something new next week. Wish me luck!!